Surviving the 6th grade

         I rarely have time to write anymore, but this evening I had the opportunity to encourage a guest blogger.  Yes, as my 11 year old spouted off about how she had survived the 6th grade and she was ready for life now.  I asked her to write about how she survived and what lessons she had learned.  As promised, I told her I would post her "paper for fun" on how she "survived" the 6th grade. (There are still 5 weeks left!)

Here is the transcribed paper:

"HI, my name is Mackenzi.  I want to tell you how 6th grade has taught me to conquer the world.  There are three major stories I want to share with you.  Most of them are either sad, or mean, or just different, so with that being said, let's get started!

In September 2018, this school year, there was this girl and she was really mad.  She went to the bathroom during class, and 20 minutes later, I started asking the teacher if I could go to the bathroom.  I was worried about her, she had not come back to class, and I knew that it only take about 10 minutes to get to the bathroom from this class. The teacher yelled at me and would not let me go to the bathroom, and finally I said, I am going to throw up, and he let me go.  I ran as fast as I could to get to the bathroom.  When I got there, she came out of the stall crying.  I will never forget what she said," I tried choking myself!" After telling her that God loved her she responded, "God can't help me."  I went to the teacher, and he let me report her to the counselor.  Ever since then, I am aware of how people are acting.

Story two.  My teacher came to school one day, and he had his shoulders up covering his neck.  We all knew he was hiding something.  He un-shrugged his shoulders, and he had a HUGE hickey, and every one screamed!  I think he was mad at us.  Later that semester he also tried to show us slenderman.  Every little thing he did was bad or inappropriate.  In both of these situations, I prayed all day!

The final story is about friends.  One day, I came to school and my friend was taking me to the movies.  We were going to have a blast, but that night she started acting like a jerk and hurting all our feelings.  The next day, I got all these texts saying, I hate you and you have no friends.  I prayed all night, the next day I kept praying, and everything turned out for the best.  The only thing is now I have 4 out of 6 friends.

So, I what I want you to know is that no matter the situation, KEEP GOD CLOSE, and don't forget HE HAS YOUR BACK.  With all that happened, I think life will be easy peezy.  Don't forget, I think each and everyone of y'all are special.  God loves you very much." ---Mackenzi G

Kids have a way of teaching us.  I sometimes look at mine and think of how much she has taught me.  I would love to tell her that it will be easy peezy because of these few lessons, but I know that is a lie.   She has so many more lessons to learn, and I am only a spectator for some of these lessons.   My parent lesson from 6th grade is this, I am mostly a spectator for some of life's hardest lessons for her.   I can not protect her from them or change her reaction to them.  I have only the single most important thing to offer her, and that is Jesus.  I can only trust him, and the lessons HE GIVES her.   I can pray without ceasing for her heart, for her friends, for her to have wisdom.  Recently in a conversation with her, she said, "Mom, why do you always give me the Jesus answer?"  I said, to her because, " I know that my answers are wrong, and nothing and no one has the authority that Jesus does.  My answers will only land you in therapy!"

Parenting a junior high kid is a challenge, even if you are using the right tools.   Ask your kids what they are learning.  Ask your kids their lessons, and then point them to the God who loves them, flaws and all.  This is mine and Mackenzi's mindset, now let's hear yours!

Proverbs 31 Challenge

A few months ago, my family started something new.   The Lord put this on my heart.  I was curious, how could I pray more effectively for my family.  What did they pray for?  I wanted to pray deeper than, "Lord meet the needs I don't know." I was nervous to talk with my husband about it.  I know that sounds strange, but my prayers are personal, and sharing them seemed intimidating almost embarrassing.  This stirred in my heart for a few days when I heard a radio pastor talking about the book of Nehemiah and how it was instruction on how to build something.   I felt as though God was saying read Nehemiah, and learn to build.  It was the perfect Segway.

My husband has started a new career.    He is now an insurance sales man.   Not just any insurance, he is selling health insurance.  When he came to me and said, "I want to sell health insurance."   I am pretty sure my inner dialogue went something like this, "Are you crazy?  Have you lost your mind?  Do you watch the news?  No one wants to be in health insurance right now, they don't even know what the health insurance laws are going to be!"  Before I could open my mouth, he followed it up with, "I just feel like this is where God is calling me."

When God calls you to something; the point is to be obedient.  Even when you can't possibly see the plan.  So, I asked him to read Nehemiah with me, and to pray for our new business together every night for 30 days and lets see what God will do.

We called it the 30 day challenge.  As a family we were going to read the Bible and pray together every day.  (sidebar) This is where I found the verse that is the secret to life.  Proverbs 20:24  " The Lord decides what a person will do; no one understands what his life is all about."  It's almost like God is telling the kids, "Hey because I said so!"

As a family we started in the book of Nehemiah and learned about building.  Then we moved to Job and on to Proverbs.  Tonight was our last night in Proverbs.

I was dreading it.   All Bible reading women know Proverbs 31.  It is the book declared as the standard for the Godly wife.  As we started to read, my hubby was ready.  He and I often joke about being what we call P31.  He was ready to give me a hard time and laugh, but something really interesting happened.

My women friends, do you read the Bible with your kids?  Do you have a daughter?  I do, and she is 11, and how she saw Proverbs 31 was a gift from God.  God's word is written for kids too.   I think we get caught up in thinking we need to create entertainment, or fill in with activities when we teach the word.   The truth is, we don't.  The bible says that the Bible is God breathed, and it is often called the living word, because the Holy Spirit can reveal in the same scripture different perspectives for different stages of life.  I was comforted by an older wiser women once before that Proverbs 31 is not just a day in the life of a woman, but it is many seasons, and not meant to be lived out as an expectation of weekly duties.

Back to my point,  Here is Proverbs 31:

31 These are the words of King Lemuel, the message his mother taught him:

² “My son, I gave birth to you.
    You are the son I prayed for.
³ Don’t waste your strength on women
    or your time on those who ruin kings.

⁴ “Kings should not drink wine, Lemuel,
    and rulers should not desire beer.
⁵ If they drink, they might forget the law
    and keep the needy from getting their rights.
⁶ Give beer to people who are dying
    and wine to those who are sad.
⁷ Let them drink and forget their need
    and remember their misery no more.

⁸ “Speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves;
    defend the rights of all those who have nothing.
⁹ Speak up and judge fairly,
    and defend the rights of the poor and needy.”

The Good Wife

¹⁰ It is hard to find a good wife,
    because she is worth more than rubies.
¹¹ Her husband trusts her completely.
    With her, he has everything he needs.
¹² She does him good and not harm
    for as long as she lives.
¹³ She looks for wool and flax
    and likes to work with her hands.
¹⁴ She is like a trader’s ship,
    bringing food from far away.
¹⁵ She gets up while it is still dark
    and prepares food for her family
    and feeds her servant girls.
¹⁶ She inspects a field and buys it.
    With money she earned, she plants a vineyard.
¹⁷ She does her work with energy,
    and her arms are strong.
¹⁸ She knows that what she makes is good.
    Her lamp burns late into the night.
¹⁹ She makes thread with her hands
    and weaves her own cloth.
²⁰ She welcomes the poor
    and helps the needy.
²¹ She does not worry about her family when it snows,
    because they all have fine clothes to keep them warm.
²² She makes coverings for herself;
    her clothes are made of linen and other expensive material.
²³ Her husband is known at the city meetings,
    where he makes decisions as one of the leaders of the land.
²⁴ She makes linen clothes and sells them
    and provides belts to the merchants.
²⁵ She is strong and is respected by the people.
    She looks forward to the future with joy.
²⁶ She speaks wise words
    and teaches others to be kind.
²⁷ She watches over her family
    and never wastes her time.
²⁸ Her children speak well of her.
    Her husband also praises her,
²⁹ saying, “There are many fine women,
    but you are better than all of them.”
³⁰ Charm can fool you, and beauty can trick you,
    but a woman who respects the Lord should be praised.
³¹ Give her the reward she has earned;
    she should be praised in public for what she has done.

As my husband read and we giggled a little about,"waking up early to feed her family."  My daughter looked up at me, and said, "mom, I think you are all of these things." She was sincere.  She thinks I am these things.  While I know that I am not all of these things, she sees me at my best.   That my friends is refreshing.

While we continued talking, my husband had a few things to say about how he read it.  Then my daughter asked a question that never occurred to me to ask.   Y'know Proverbs 31 is the rules for a Godly wife, the book that we use to compare ourselves, and make judgements that are the results of a sinful world.  I never thought to ask the question posed to me, "Mom what does it say about a husband?"

What an amazing revelation!  We went back and found that this book has some great advice on the character you should look for in a man.  What does Proverbs 31 say about the husband?  A good man should:

⁸ “Speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves;
    defend the rights of all those who have nothing.
⁹ Speak up and judge fairly,
    and defend the rights of the poor and needy.”

Her husband trusts her completely.
    With her, he has everything he needs

Her husband is known at the city meetings,
    where he makes decisions as one of the leaders of the land.

Her husband also praises her,
²⁹ saying, “There are many fine women,
    but you are better than all of them.”


The 30 day challenge has long past the 30 days and become a daily routine we all look forward.   As we grow a new business and approach the 6th grade and having a junior high student, I can't think of a better way to find our answers.  The days ahead are going to be filled with comparison.  They are going to be filled with questions about purpose and defining self.  As we look for definition, should it not be defined by the creator?

I challenge you to open your bible, pick a book and read it with your family.   You might find that the questions of your kids, will help you to see that what you thought looked like a fail, is really a win after all!

This is Miranda's Mindset, now let me hear yours!

Goodness - Birthday Blessings

    It has been a long time since I have written anything.  Tonight I am overwhelmed with the desire to write about the Goodness of God.  Today, we celebrated  my daughter's 11th birthday.  I can't help but feel as though she is quite possibly the best example of God's goodness.

    During the Spring I taught a bible study class called Spirit Girls.   It was designed to teach 4th and 5th grade girls about the Fruits of the Spirit. (Galations 5: 22-23)  I felt as though I was equipped to teach this class.  I had worked in a private Christian school that focused on character education using the fruits of the spirit.   However, there is always room for learning when God is involved.   As I prepared the week we would spend on God's Goodness, I learned a few things.

    Kindness and Goodness are similar.   They have a major difference.  Goodness, is defined as a deliberate choice to do right, a firm persistence to follow only good.  Kindness is treating people with respect and being polite and mannerly.  The goodness of God is being able to tell someone TRUTH in love and stand firm, even when that TRUTH is hard.

     As I pondered this, I realize that, this is precisely why God gives children (for some maybe its your spouse).  This gift is given so you can experience TRUTH in love.  You see kids, especially young ones, have truth, and they don't mind blurting it out. As I think about celebrating my daughter, I think of the sweet truths she has utter to me.  Mom, you are too old to...... or mom, you should change, I don't think that fits.   Mom remember when you said....... well can I say that now, because I feel that word coming on.   The truth is, my daughter doesn't miss a thing, she sees all the good, the bad, and the ugly.  She has a way of giving truth. Sometimes that truth hurts, and sometimes it is so profound, that it can only be at the prompting of the Holy Spirit, shaping me to be a better mom.

     She is not only filled with Truth, but she is filled with love.   I had no idea when God gave me her that things were going to change the way they did.  I was afraid.   I was afraid to have a baby.  As a type 1 diabetic for 20+ years at the time, I just knew what would happen.   I had seen, Steel Magnolia's, I knew a baby would wreck my body and leave me needing a new kidney.   God says, "I did not give you a spirit of fear!" (2 Timothy 1:6-7)  He gave me a baby and he did change my body.  Only instead of wrecking it, he expanded it, literally.   It was not just expanding my belly and feet, but it was my heart that grew.  You see, God's goodness opened my heart.  He filled this new space with a sweet dimpled smile, bright sparkly eyes, and a giggle that I call my favorite song.  As her personality grows, I see that she loves people deeply.  When she says she is praying for you, you can count on her to pray.   He showed me through His gift in her, that love can be much deeper and wider than I had ever dared to love or imagine.  He whispers, my love for you is greater than this.  His love for her is greater than mine.  If that is not goodness, I don't know what is.

    If you want to see God's goodness, take a look at your kids (or maybe your spouse).   Look around for the person brave enough to tell you the truth, even when the outfit doesn't fit, or the words aren't right.   Look around for the person who loves even when the outfit doesn't fit or the words aren't right.  I think God's goodness is all around us, we just need to be brave enough to see it, accept it, and give it back.  I think God's goodness is right in our families, so don't miss it!

    This is my mindset, now let me hear yours!

Titus 2 Friends and Mentors

This is a devotion I gave for the women's ministry: Soul Café.

Like every time I have to give a devotion, I have a great idea.  I say something like, I know exactly what I want to talk about.  The problem with this statement is that, every time God says, this is not about what you want, it is about what I want.  So I intended to talk about fixing things.  How as women we want to fix everything, and we think we can, but we really should just be fixing our eyes on Jesus and trusting him to take care of things.  God in His wisdom, has laid this on my heart instead for you’ll tonight.  

As I look around at the faces of the women gathered here, I am sure we could hold a contest. That contest would be who is the most tired?  Who has run around the most?  Who has the most to do?   When I listen to women talk, time is always an issue.  Where are we putting it? Or it never feels like there is enough. Or just a general feeling of disconnect because we are partially plugged into so many things, but we are connected to none.

It used to be that women did things together.  They would get together without an agenda.  Better yet the only agenda was to help each other, to share real friendship and to mentor one another.

I don’t know about you but I have 407 friends on facebook.  I can get text messages all day long.  I check on people and share minor moments, but many times even with all the technology around I still feel disconnected.  Who can I really tell the truth about me to?  Who can I share my fears with?  Who can I share my broken heart with?  Who is going to pray with me or for me when I am just not able to pray for myself?  Who will be my friend when I am simply unloveable?  There are very few people I am truly connected to, people whom I am willing to share the ugly side of me. 

As women we often struggle alone, trying to balance the act of mom, wife, daughter, daughter-in-law, employee, and friend, because when it is all said and done, our friendships are polite acquaintances.  It takes time to let anyone know the real things that are happening in our lives, and most of those moments take place between carpool or dinner, or whatever other obligation we have committed too.  Sometimes we don’t even stop to ask each other, how are you? And take the time to really listen because we are always on the go.

What does the Bible says about being a Godly woman, Proverbs 31:10-30

^10 [b]A wife of noble character who can find?
    She is worth far more than rubies.
¹¹ Her husband has full confidence in her
    and lacks nothing of value.
¹² She brings him good, not harm,
    all the days of her life.
¹³ She selects wool and flax
    and works with eager hands.
¹⁴ She is like the merchant ships,
    bringing her food from afar.
¹⁵ She gets up while it is still night;
    she provides food for her family
    and portions for her female servants.
¹⁶ She considers a field and buys it;
    out of her earnings she plants a vineyard.
¹⁷ She sets about her work vigorously;
    her arms are strong for her tasks.
¹⁸ She sees that her trading is profitable,
    and her lamp does not go out at night.
¹⁹ In her hand she holds the distaff
    and grasps the spindle with her fingers.
²⁰ She opens her arms to the poor
    and extends her hands to the needy.
²¹ When it snows, she has no fear for her household;
    for all of them are clothed in scarlet.
²² She makes coverings for her bed;
    she is clothed in fine linen and purple.
²³ Her husband is respected at the city gate,
    where he takes his seat among the elders of the land.
²⁴ She makes linen garments and sells them,
    and supplies the merchants with sashes.
²⁵ She is clothed with strength and dignity;
    she can laugh at the days to come.
²⁶ She speaks with wisdom,
    and faithful instruction is on her tongue.
²⁷ She watches over the affairs of her household
    and does not eat the bread of idleness.
²⁸ Her children arise and call her blessed;
    her husband also, and he praises her:
²⁹ “Many women do noble things,
    but you surpass them all.
³⁰ Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting;
    but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.

So we spend our days quite like this, trying to accomplish this laundry list of things that a Godly woman should do.  I don’t know about you but I fall short.   The passage is overwhelming to me, and I don’t even know where to begin.  I’ve always wondered how can one woman do all of this?  So we try and we run from place to place missing something very important.  A older wiser woman finally shared with me the secret to this passage, she told me, it is not written as a day or a week in the life, but as different seasons in the life of a woman. 

The thing about today is that we live in a world that wants us to do everything in a day, and it wants us to do it alone, to have no mentors and no real friendships.  The world wants us to feel comforted by facebook status, and a number of friends, even though it is hollow and lonely.  The world is pleased that our time is swept away and that no one is reminding us of real friendship, fellowship, or mentorship.

Titus: 2: 3-5

Likewise, teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live, not to be slanderers or addicted to much wine, but to teach what is good. ⁴ Then they can urge the younger women to love their husbands and children, ⁵ to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God.

You see we live in a time where we do not make time for mentorship, or friendship the exceeds a surface level.  We don’t call each other anymore, we text.  We don’t visit each other because our time is spent working, carting kids around, and making up all the home responsibilities we put off to be at work or somewhere else.   We often look at older people from afar, and don’t make time to value their experience.  With Google at our finger tips we can search for any answer we might need, instead of seeking out the advice and experience from the women around us.  We don’t want to be exposed for not knowing, or needing help.  We don’t want to recognize that God uses His people to help in audible ways, so like the famous story goes, we drown on the roof waiting for God to show up and missing the boats or opportunities He sent.

Now a lot of people ask me about my relationship with my mother in law.  They wonder how we have the relationship we do.  She would say, she just decided she was going to like me no matter what.  I would say, I decided I was going to include her, because she never had a daughter.  She is one of my best friends.  She has been the friend and mentor that I needed at almost every step of my married and adult life.  She has been brave enough to tell me the hard things, and I have been wise enough to listen and not be condemned.  We have shared a Titus 2 relationship.  She has taught the things I missed growing up.  She and I are balanced, she is the good cop and I am the bad cop.  She encourages me to stand up for myself and say things I would never without her pushing.  She brings the best out in me, even when it hurts.  She adds a dynamic to my daughter her granddaughter that cannot come from me or someone of my generation.  In response, I share, I love, I forgive, I listen, I pray, and I respect her, even when I don’t agree or am offended.  You see we have learned that our friendship makes us both better.  We learn from each other, and as a result we grow in our faith through the gifts God has shown us in each other.

Friendship is hard.  It takes work and it takes time, and these days’ time and friendship are two things that are hard to come by.  God in His wisdom knows how important fellowship with likeminded believers is.  We are instructed to encourage each other daily.  1 Thessalonians 5 talks about because we are in the light and not the darkness we should encourage each other and build each other up.  Hebrews 3:13 says:  But encourage one another daily, as long as it is called “Today,” so that none of you may be hardened by sin’s deceitfulness.  We must tell each other truth.  We must create a language of truth, and  encourage each other with God’s word.

You see, as I look around at the faces tonight.  I see young women, I see older women, I see women who are new Christians, I see women with grown children, babies, and everywhere in between.  We are all struggling with time and connection.  We are all trying to figure out something.  We need to be brave enough to let someone in.  We need to be brave enough to listen to truth, and not feel condemned.  We need to speak truth, and love.  We need to lean on each other as a fellowship of Christian women. 

I always like to leave a challenge on the table.   Tonight I ask each of you to look around, find someone you can mentor in Christ.  I challenge you to be brave enough to speak truth in love to each other.  I challenge you to be brave enough to accept friendship that goes deeper than, “I am fine.” I challenge you to make time for Christian fellowship without agenda, but a fellowship of friendship and encouragement that will grow you in Christ.

Philemon 1:6, has this prayer that I want to make our prayer for tonight:

“…and I pray that the fellowship of your faith may become effective through the knowledge of every good thing which is in you for Christ’s sake.

Thank you for coming tonight. 

My almost 40 life crisis

So for those of you I keep up with on a regular basis, you know I have been claiming to have an almost 40 life crisis.  So here is how the story goes, well my version of the story.

This passed Friday, I got dressed for work.  I chose a shirt that had been hanging in my closet over a year.  I found it on the sale rack at the feed store.  I thought it was cute,  it is a black, of course, with  3/4 length sleeves and a lace trim.  It has been hanging in my closet with tags on it because, I just never had anything to wear with it.  I finally broke down and wore it on casual Friday with jeans.  I looked in the mirror and from the front, it looked cute, and BONUS, it covered my chubby rolls. I felt good!  That is until I got home.  When I stopped at my mother in laws house to pick up my daughter she said, "Miranda!  Your back and bra are showing!"  What? my voice at first as if this were a joke, but one look at her face and then I said again, WHAT? this time with terror in my voice.  I have been in this all day!  Are you serious?  She snapped this picture:

My mind is racing.  I AM LIKE THE PEOPLE OF WALMART!  Almost 40 year old chubby moms, DO NOT let this hang out AT WORK!!!  I work for a prestigious law firm, known for a well know CHRISTIAN endorsement.  This was beyond embarrassing.  I never once turned and looked at my back in the mirror.  I was embarrassed and I felt totally stupid.  So then I called my much younger, 20 year co-worker and said, why did not you not tell me I was uncovered!  She is dying laughing on the other end, as I gave her these future instructions: if I have toilet paper hanging off my butt or IF THINGS ARE SHOWING that should not be showing PLEASE tell me.  Her response was, "I just thought you were being risky!"  RISKY RISKY!  I am a chubby almost 40 year old mom, risky is staying up past 10 on a school night not showing my back AT WORK ALL DAY!  Then in my mind I made the courageous decision to call my boss and apologizing for not looking at my back in the mirror and potentially being totally inappropriate at work all day.  Thank God for grace because the laughter ensued and the comment," I just thought you were going clubbing," was made.

OH dear Jesus, no thank you!

Fast forward to Sunday.  I have signed my daughter and I up for this Bible based program called daughters of the King, or better known as Club DOK.  Club DOK is a Bible based program that teaches what God says about Modesty and character.  Today's lesson, outer beauty.  This program is  for 4th and 5th grade girls, and it is to help them focus on what God says about them not what the world has to say.  Today the object lesson was this, take two post it notes. On note 1 write something you are insecure about regarding your outer appearance. On note 2 write something you like about your appearance.  Then there was a ceremonial tearing and throwing away of note 1, AKA the insecurity, but coupled with that, the girls had to stand in front of the mirror and say that they were created by God, and they were created to be the way HE wanted.

Now, I can give you a lot of scripture about being Chosen by God.  I can tell you and have in other blogs, that flaws are natural and God knew them and still chose you.  But there is something to say, when you hear what I heard today.....  After the mirror each mother and daughter were given two sheets of paper, one was about ourselves, and the other was about either mom if you are the daughter, or daughter if you are the mom.  We were instructed to write 5 things down that we like about the outer beauty of each other and ourselves.  As I sat there thinking, and thinking of the things I liked about myself, the lady gave an example: maybe it is I feel cute in a certain outfit.  WELL,in light of Friday that wasn't going to work for me because, I felt cute until I realized it had no back!  BUT, in that moment, I turned to my daughter and this is what she was writing about me:

I love my mom's T-rex arms.

I love that my mom is short......

My daughter had listed everyone of my insecurities out on her page as things she really loved about me.  Now if you have never met my girl, she is kind and loving, sensitive and sweet, the polar opposite of me in so many ways.  Her heart is not dark, like mine can be, she doesn't see flaws or imperfections as a stumbling blocks.  She truly sees the world with the eyes of God.  She sees potential and value.  She sees value in all of my insecurities. 

It was like she set a lightbulb off in me.  I can't help but think God is and has been teaching me something in my almost 40 life crisis.  He keeps telling me to stop looking at all the flaws; stop obsessing over the things that are not perfect, stopping looking for something to be wrong and look at the potential.  For those moms out there, who are working so hard to find a balance in life, thinking that there is this perfect place, but you are just missing it, I am here to say there is no perfect place this side of heaven.  There is one flaw after imperfection after mistake, after flaw, after imperfection, and mistake again and again.  The only thing we can hope in is to know the love of Jesus, who sees us as potential.  He sees us as valuable, just as we are, and sometimes we are lucky to get a glimpse of His sweet reminders in the most unlikely places.

Proverbs 31:28

"Her children arise and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her...."

Maybe in the midst of the hurry, and the midst of the imperfections and flaws, we are missing the REAL things that bless our children and families.

This week, I hope and pray that you can experience the blessing, even if it comes in T-rex arms and a short package.

This is my mindset, now let me hear yours!

 ¹⁴For this reason I kneel before the Father, ¹⁵ from whom every family in heaven and on earth derives its name. ¹⁶ I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being, ¹⁷ so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, ¹⁸ may have power, together with all the Lord’s holy people, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, ¹⁹ and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God. Ephesians 3:14-19

A lesson in trust

Have you ever been in the place where God is yelling at you: MOVE!  A place where it is undeniable that it is time to get out of your comfort zone and do something in HIS will.  That is where I am right now. 

Joshua 1: 9 says: "Haven’t I commanded you: be strong and courageous? Do not be afraid or discouraged, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.”

I use this verse all the time. I tell my daughter, don't be afraid, God is with you wherever you go.  I say things like be strong and have courage.  You are not alone, God is always with you, and then I send her off to do this or that, and expect her to have the courage to do whatever I've asked her to.

Then there is me.  I make plans.  I put my ducks in a row.  Some may even say I like to control things.  I like my schedule, and I like my box.  Have you ever noticed, that is NOT how God works?  God almost never picks the likely person for the job.  David, the youngest of all Jesse's sons will be King.  David also the smallest soldier will slay the giant.  Saul a well known persecutor of Christians, is set apart and changed to Paul to be a major proponent of the Gospel and writer of several New Testament books.  Gideon, self proclaimed weakest of the weak, is sent to lead an army of men.  Jonah a guy who can't stand the people of Nineveh is the messenger God uses to give them one more chance.  All of this to say, God does not call us to be in a comfortable box.  He calls us to listen and obey when He is ready to move.

As the story goes, it was the last week of school.  As the Director of Development I was already preparing for back to school.  I was setting up fundraising dates and beginning of the year events.  Then God gave me a hiccup.  I was informed that my job may be either eliminated or modified based on necessary budget cuts. My immediate response was this, I am going to take a couple of weeks to think about how I want to proceed, and I am going to pray about it.  My words were exactly this, I want to make an intentional decision, not a reactional decision.  Having said that, I began to think and pray about what God's will was for me. I had no idea what to do.

The Bible says:

“Keep asking, and it will be given to you. Keep searching, and you will find. Keep knocking, and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives, and the one who searches finds, and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened. Matthew 7:7-8
or
"Now if any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives to all generously and without criticizing, and it will be given to him."  James 1:5

This is what God gave me.  He gave me a church sermon called: What to do when you don't know what to do.  I have told this story a couple of times and it was like the lights dimmed and the spot light was on me, and the voice of the Lord, which sounds like James Earl Jones in my head, said, MIRANDA...... listen.  By the end of the sermon, I was crying and I knew what I needed to do.  I knew that I needed to resign from the comfortable spot I was in.  I knew God wasn't just hinting around, he was ready for me to MOVE.

The thing is, it was a hard decision because there is a guilt (Not of GOD) about leaving work in a Church/ Christian environment.   There is also a Spiritual blanket that people cover themselves with, saying that they are doing the Lords work so they need to stay, even when it is time to move on.  I don't think either of these mentalities represent what God wants us to feel.  I think He wants us to listen to Him, be passionate about Him, and then move as HE sees necessary, especially when it is outside the church walls.  If we never move out, how can we bring people in?

In my decision to MOVE there are a few things God laid on my heart:

1) God is not a God of left overs.  I have a thing about left overs.  It is my personal hang up.  I think I often get the left overs and settle for them, because that is what I THINK I deserve.  God is clear in his plans for us.
Jeremiah 29-11 says: For I know the plans I have for you”—this is the Lord’s declaration—“plans for your welfare, not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope.

His plan is greater than I could ask or imagine, and God does not want me to stay, for staying sake.  He wants me to move, to grow, and to continue to be refined by HIS plan, not my own.  Some one told me to have faith, and that is what I am doing, taking a leap of faith that God's plan for me is so much better than the plan I had in mind.

2)  God wants me to Trust HIM in everything, and not pick and choose when and where I want to.  The thing about this whole situation was I had a plan.  That plan included Christian education for my daughter.  It included keeping her in what I deemed a safe environment where I know everyone.  God was clear on this, as He put it on my heart, that controlling Mackenzi only limits the opportunities God has to grow her and bless her.  That if I truly give up Mackenzi and trust God with her future, she will be far better off than any plan I had for her.  Trust is not something I fall into easily, and especially not with my precious daughter.   I keep reading the Psalms over and over looking at verses to remind me, God is my/her protector, He is my/her shield and my/her rock, and that His love is never ending.  In the midst of all this change and chaos, I have peace, and know that trusting God with Mackenzi is so much wiser than trying to control a plan that isn't His.

3) God wants me to TRUST HIM.... just incase you didn't catch it the first time.   It is not only the plan for Mackenzi, but it is the job and plan for me.  I have to work.  Turning in a resignation with no job, is CRAZY in my book, BUT GOD, well He works in a different economy.   My God is not only a protector, a shield, and a rock, but HE IS A PROVIDER.  I turned in my resignation and emailed a few of my contacts.  God is so good that with in the first 10 minutes I had two responses, and a third followed later.  I received a request to talk, a request for my resume, and a job offer.  THAT IS GOD!  He confirmed my decision many times over, and has helped remind me that TRUSTING GOD is the safest place to be.  Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not rely on your own understanding; think about Him in all your ways, and He will guide you on the right paths. Proverbs 3;5-6

God is moving in my life right now, and the truth is all I can do is trust Him and watch where He is taking me.   He continues to give me confirmation in so many places and people.  A sermon just this week  on NO REGRETS confirming that a life of no regrets, is a life that perseveres TRUSTING in God.  God is really with me wherever I go, and He is so good!

This is my story and I hope that it blesses you.  We live in a crazy world where  many people are lost.  I hope in some small way, this tiny real life story will encourage you to TRUST in Jesus today.  He is the author of love and the creator of hope.  Until next time I leave you with this prayer:

¹⁶ I never stop giving thanks for you as I remember you in my prayers. ¹⁷ I pray that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the glorious Father, would give you a spirit of wisdom and revelation in the knowledge of Him. ¹⁸ I pray that the perception of your mind may be enlightened so you may know what is the hope of His calling, what are the glorious riches of His inheritance among the saints, ¹⁹ and what is the immeasurable greatness of His power to us who believe, according to the working of His vast strength. Ephesians 1:15-19